Thank you to those who have written to “dear efap” for input on your dilemmas. As you are aware, we read every inquiry that comes in but we are only able to print a small selection of responses.  Our “pithy” answers are modeled after the lighter hearted Dear Abby style and are grounded in common sense.  If your issues require a more personalized level of support please call EFAP (1-800-505-4929) and we can confidentially book you a counselling appointment with a senior level therapist.

Send us your questions

We welcome all inquiries – please submit these to dear.efap@efap.ca. All printed responses use the anonymous descriptor that you sign your inquiry with and do not reveal any identifying information. Our goal is to support you through insight and common sense.

Below is our response to the next selection – enjoy!

I’m an excluded employee, and although part of VCH we don’t seem to get much attention– I feel pretty isolated. I’m overworked as there’s too much to do and not enough of us. I’m tired, irritated at times with my coworkers, and stressed. My supervisor is also strained, and it seems like the stress of being perpetually under-resourced and its impact on a person and a department is ignored. VCH chants “Respectful Workplace” but they seem to forget about respectful workload. I care about my patients, I love my job and I really like my supervisor, but this is too much. I’m worn down and not taking care of myself and I feel like I’m about to explode!

• Exhausted Employee

Dear Exhausted Employee,

I feel the pain and frustration in your words. I see two issues here: the workplace and the impact of the workplace on you personally. Let me begin with the latter as that’s my wheelhouse. Know that you’re not alone, we’re here for you. I understand wanting to explode, but exploding isn’t going to help you or anyone else. Talking about these things can help, so please give us a call at 1-800-505-4929 – there is confidential help available to you right now. We have counsellors and wellness experts who can help you navigate how to manage what’s going on and set up a personalized plan with you. If you’re feeling like that might help, please do pick up the phone, day or night.

As for the former issue – the workplace – this isn’t my wheelhouse, as I’m not an HR expert, but there are a few things I will put out for you to consider. I know that VCH wouldn’t want you, your coworkers or your supervisor to be suffering (as it sounds like you are), and would want to hear about it. Reaching out preventatively can also have a better outcome than reacting negatively. So, maybe a place to consider starting is for you and your supervisor to have a conversation about exactly what’s going on for you. It sounds like you have a good relationship with her, but that she may not know exactly what’s going on for you right now. From there, you and your supervisor could discuss next steps, such as having a conversation with her leader on your identified situation. You may also want to consult with HR as they could help you look at the issues at hand. Finally, this is not something to sit and suffer with in silence, this is something to be brought forward for discussion, so I encourage you to think about ways that it can come forward.

As I said before, know you are not alone. It sounds like there is a lot on your plate, so please give us a call.

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The advice offered in this column is meant to be used as general guidance based on the facts provided. The opinions or views expressed should not be relied on as treatment or counselling services. If you are a VCH staff member and find yourself in need of counselling or support, please contact EFAP toll free at 1-800-505-4929 or 604-872-4929, your family doctor, or another appropriately trained and qualified specialist.