Thank you to those who have written to “dear efap” for input on your dilemmas. As you are aware, we read every inquiry that comes in but we are only able to print a small selection of responses. Our “pithy” answers are modeled after the lighter hearted Dear Abby style and are grounded in common sense. If your issues require a more personalized level of support please call EFAP (1-800-505-4929) and we can confidentially book you a counselling appointment with a senior level therapist.

Send us your questions

We welcome all inquiries – please submit these to dear.efap@efap.ca. All printed responses use the anonymous descriptor that you sign your inquiry with and do not reveal any identifying information. Our goal is to support you through insight and common sense.

Below is our response to the next selection – enjoy!
I can’t sleep. I am a younger employee at VCH and I work at computers and am quite tech savvy. I am pretty much left to my own devices during the day and don’t get much supervision. This is good as they trust me but bad as I feel pretty isolated. When I feel isolated my anxiety goes up. As a result of my anxiety and the havoc it plays on not letting me sleep – I get up way too early. I then fall asleep at work sometimes. I also don’t have much of a social life and no self – confidence. Anxiety is really holding me captive and I want to be released from it. Can you please help me?
– Anxious Awaiting Assistance

Dear Anxious Awaiting Assistance,
The short answer – yes of course we can help you. I am so very glad that you wrote in. Please know that you are not alone. In fact as listed on the mindyourmind.ca website: According to the Anxiety Disorders Association of Canada, “the 12 month prevalence for any anxiety disorder is over 12% and one in four Canadians (25%) will have at least one anxiety disorder in their lifetime.” Again, important to note that the 2.6% mentioned above pertain to generalized anxiety disorder only. There are 7 other anxiety disorders that are not part of this statistic. In fact, anxiety is the most common mental illness in Canada.

Anxiety can be really tough to manage. It seems to find a way into so many different parts of our lives and quietly take hold. It can disturb sleep, eating, and social times. It is a sneaky little devil but we can help you to “wrassle” it. Counselling to learn how to change the way you feel by changing the way you think can be a great place to start. It is a skill that one can adapt that allows you to stand up to the old thinking patterns and create some new ones. Please do give us at a call at EFAP (1-800-505-4929).We can provide you with short term treatment at no cost. Let us help you get a handle on this.

It is also always good to go and meet with your family doctor and check in and let them know what you are struggling with. Sometimes medication is warranted and sometimes not but it is always a good thing to meet with your doc and let them know that you are working to get it under control. When you are motivated like you are, it makes it easier for your family doctor to support you in the most appropriate way.

A super great resource for you in tackling this condition is Anxiety BC. This website is amazing in helping you understand your anxiety as it provides very practical usable information. They have countless resources on how to tackle anxiety. I would really recommend that you spend some time on the site as it is full of tool kits, app information, public presentation information all geared to reducing anxiety. And it is all free!

As for a few things you can do right now…well let’s take on the lack of sleep piece. I noted that in the email that you wrote to us you said that you work at computers and are tech savvy. Perfect! This is because some of the very coolest mobile support for anxiety is in the form of very downloadable apps. I know — who knew? There are some great ones on mindfulness (mindfulness is an evidence based strategy to use to reduce anxiety), super ones that focus on helping you get to sleep, and really effective ones that help you calm your mind. One for instance that is geared to young adults is called “Mindshift” but there are many – so please do check them out and get them on to your tablet device or smart phone so they can start helping you today.

There are also some great groups for anxiety (consider the BC Mood Disorders Association). You mentioned that you have been dealing with this for a while and that your social life is not great and your confidence low. In such a situation I would recommend for you to consider a psychoeducational group. Not only do they teach you about managing your anxiety in a very concrete and emotionally safe way, they also provide a bit of social exposure due to their group format. This might be a low key place to start as it won’t require you to stick your neck out to meet people but rather just to show up. This might then allow you to build your confidence to become part of a more social situation. The mood disorders association has many programs. They are not the only ones of course, there are many others, but the key here is that the idea of going to a group of like-minded people might be something to strongly consider as a first step.

Good for you for reaching out.  Good for you for wanting to make change. Good for you in taking on anxiety and letting it know that you no longer want it in your life. Onward!

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The advice offered in this column is meant to be used as general guidance based on the facts provided. The opinions or views expressed should not be relied on as treatment or counselling services. If you do find yourself in need of counselling or support, please contact EFAP toll free at 1-800-505-4929 or 604-872-4929, your family doctor, or another appropriately trained and qualified specialist.